February 2010 – Mother bird
February 16th, 2010 § Leave a Comment
School. It’s like Life. We had 2 hours of ‘Essential life skills in the wilderness’ lecture and 3 hours of practical on ‘Maintaining biological cleanliness in the New age’. Well at least they were better than the compulsory module, ‘How to live in harmony with Human Beings’ where we had to interact with Humans at their homes. Interaction is too complex for a carrot like me. I think it’s in my genes. Not that I know where they come from. Till today, my 30th day at school, I have no friends. I’m not picky or anything like that. It comes naturally that I don’t see anything in others and others don’t fancy me. Fair. And it’s easy. No conflicts. The best thing is, nobody asks me about class work, home work, Work. Because I don’t know. I just do what I’m told to do and after that it leaves my head. If you don’t believe me, just tap the side of my head and all you hear will be hollow reverberations lasting for approximately 5 seconds. It’s that empty. The only thing I do remember from school are the dreams I make up during lectures. I normally dream with my eyes open for the entire 2 hours. I have this magical ability to do that, thanks to this gift of a head from forces above. Don’t ask me how. As I said, it’s empty.
Today, a mother bird with something sticking out of its back appeared before me. I knew it was a ‘mother bird’ because birds are kind and Master said it’s gotta be a ‘Mother’ as mothers are generally kind(a sweeping statement but Master showed no intention of explaining further). I guess it’s either Master really misses Mother master or Master just having a natural preference for females.
The winds were gusting around Mother bird as she became increasingly visible. That irritated me quite a bit because I was nearly blown off my feet and had to pose in such a way as to maximize surface area to withstand the wind. Mother bird looked down at me with her black beady eye, which I could not clearly see as she had lumps of hair covering half of her face. She kept staring at me. And kept staring. No one has done that to me before so it kinda pissed me off. I stared back. I stared. I stared at the crown resting on the top of her head. I stared at each of the 3 sharp points – up down up down up down. I stared at her feet(they were like wishy washy hair brooms). I stared at her sharp cured beak(which reminded me of another kind of bird I saw at the zoo excursion). I stared at the various long and short hairs on her body. I stared down each hair from top to bottom, before proceeding to the one on its left, and then its right. In this way I can remember which ones I’ve stared at and the ones remaining. Done with the hairs, I continued to stare at a small stalk on the side of her body. Then I noticed a larger stalk sticking out from her back. It was slightly different from the small one. It was queer. And had a slight glow at the tip(if you squint your eyes). With nothing left to stare, I met her beady eye once more as a cue to inform her that I’m done staring.
Mother bird did not even blink. Then as if it was a natural reaction, I pointed at the long stalk’s glowing tip with the index finger of my right hand, and guess what, a second guest of wind swept by and took Mother bird away. She was no more.
Do I even need to learn how to survive in the wilderness?
With this magic finger, I’ll just point. That’s what fingers are for huh. So this is the magic finger dream I had in school today. If you can point just like me, you probably don’t like school too.
January 2010 – Pao’s first letter
January 16th, 2010 § Leave a Comment
Not a bad day today at all, considering that I’m doing something I do almost everyday. You may not think I do(from the looks of me) but I do. I write in my diary. I have a diary, yes. There’s a small lock at the front and the configuration consists of 10 numerals. No one will bother to figure it out, if anyone cares at all. But well, today’s not quite the same. I’m writing to you. Master said I should change my routine for once and write to a real, living person. It hasn’t happened before so pardon me if I should use terms the dictionary may not recognise (maybe you will).
So… hi. You are my new friend I see. Master said you are interested to know about me. From my point of view, well, I think he has an ulterior motive which I can’t quite figure out at the moment. Please don’t think I have anything against my Master. I am a complex thing. Master told me that when I first emerged from the ground, the sky turned dark and all sorts of colorful things started appearing and gathering around me. Then they danced. I do not know what those things are but Master said they are symbols. Some are very important, some are just… distractions. He told me to remember the important ones and if they appear again, I was to quickly catch them with both hands. I did not ask him what they were for and I definitely do not know how I’m going to do that since my hands are placed by my sides most of the time. They said they feel most comfortable snugged right at that spot so I let them be. Might we well, I do not have to use them that much. They are so tiny I wonder how they can withstand the rigor of common use. I can’t tell you much about my legs either. Most of the time I forget that they are these. That’s why those red shoes – to remind myself. I honestly prefer the red shoes to my legs, though Master constantly reminds me that to show preferential treatment is politically incorrect.
As for my head, it is the saddest part of my existence. Master said being unique is not such an unfortunate thing after all and I should be glad to be alive. You really cannot control certain things in life and this was definitely under nobody’s control(but maybe some unseen forces from above). To put things simply, I was thumped on the head by a huge object falling from above as I was emerging from the ground for the first time, to breathe my first gasp of air as a fully fledged carrot. That moment was like a candle being snuffed out by a huge gust of wind. I felt my body driven back down with a violent jam and my mind dislocated. It rose up, left my body and floated towards the foreign object, then lodging gently into a cushioned void seemingly made just right for it. It was such a quiet and natural operation I actually felt a calming sensation when it was completed. But after that, I lost consciousness. That’s how I became me.
Master named me Pao because the moment I came to, I had this pissed off look on my face. Pao means bubble in Mandarin, and I am, well, alike to a bursting bubble(with many lives I suppose) because I tend to be bad-tempered, quick-tempered etc etc. But basically, I’m still a carrot. Just not the kind on your plates.
I’ve got to attend school. I’m running late now.
